Mo’ Mots

I thought I was pregnant for the longest time
until my body finally pushed through,
without the pill to tell it what to do.
And then, with the blood came the verse.

You don’t want to read about this.
Not another woman-vagina-menstruation
exposition on art and blood and the life force.
You have to say it like that, all italicized.

But I can’t deny the connection,
the build up of gunk, the old blood
that came more than a week late
in a rush, a desperate run to clean out pipes.

And now here I am, with you disgusted,
my mind thinking in poetry, churning
too fast for my fingers to keep up,
to expel the thoughts too long bottled in.

from: christine.borden@gmail.com
to: you@email.com
date: Wed, Sep 30, 2009 at 3:04 AM
subject: new poem

Your name,

I don’t have a journal or a personal blog
detailing the inanities of my life.
But sometimes I send emails
to people I know will never respond
just to know that somewhere out there
I am being read.

Christine

They laughed when I read my poem. It wasn’t funny. I said a bad word.
I was talking about feeling alone even in the company of others.
This poem is not a poem about my insecurities
as a poet as a writer as a woman as a person.
But that laugh echoed in the room, a room like a poem
closing in on the hollow laugh. Awkward laugh. It struck me.
I stared back, into the empty space from which it came
and read to it, until it could see what I saw, the nothingness and the depth.

-30-

In reference to this poem.

She creeps, announced, into your room,
her cold hand pressing against your stomach.
You shiver at her touch, pull for the sheet.
Fuzzy socks tuck back into the bed.

She brings you a basket of corn,
the last haul, dangling from her arm.
Dirt under her nails, she smells of earth,
the cutting scent of decay and growth.

The night crackles as darkness falls,
dusk giving way to crisp air and burning leaves.
In the distance, the smell of Halloween nights
breaks into candy bits and foreign homes.

-30-

Not sure I like the title, but I feel this will become a growing collection every year, along with this previous poem.